A man was left questioning whether he should end it with his fiancée after she put his car up for sale to pay for their wedding without his permission.
The 30-year-old, who lives in the Middle East, told how she began piling on the pressure for them to tie the knot after receiving invites to her friends’ weddings.
He claims she urged him to ask his parents for money to fund their big day – despite the fact they are struggling to pay for his sister’s cancer treatment.
She then reportedly demanded he sell his $17,000 Hyundai Accent so that they could use the money to get married before the end of the year – despite the fact he needs it to drive two hours to work every day.
A man was left questioning whether he should end it with his fiancée after she put his car up for sale to pay for their wedding without his permission. He shared his plight on Reddit
The man shared his plight on Reddit, where it was then shared on the Facebook group That’s It I’m Wedding Shaming.
Many social media users encouraged the man to end his relationship, suggesting his fiancée is more concerned with having a wedding than a marriage.
Writing on the ‘Am I The A**hole’ forum, the man told how he uses his car to get to work every day, having struggled to find a job with his degree in his local area.
‘The nearest company is two hours away and I can not move because of my house mortgage,’ he wrote.
‘My fiancée of one year has been rushing me for a wedding saying she’s waited longer than any of her friends did, she asked if I could ask my parents to pay but my parents are already struggling with my sister’s cancer and they’ve been spending money on chemo (they don’t have insurance, and no one is willing to help, it’s really messed up here).
The man was stunned when he saw his car had gone up for sale and claimed he took a screenshot of the advert on Facebook as proof (pictured)
‘I told my fiancée that I’m starting to save money to be able to afford the wedding expenses, and she didn’t accept saying that “I sneak my money behind her back to help my parents pay for my sister’s treatment”. I told her that I can’t turn down my parents who are struggling and have no one who can support, not to mention paying her for things like presents/clothes/dinners etc.’
When his fiancée received a wedding invitation from her best friend last week, the man recalled how she came to him in tears.
‘She said that her best friend apparently got herself a reliable fiancé unlike me and she said she got sick of people asking her when she’ll get married,’ he wrote.
‘I told her to tell them off it wasn’t their business, but she told me that I needed to do something.’
He then claimed she ordered him to stop answering phone calls from his father and instructed him to sell his car to pay for the wedding – and refused to back down when he told her it could cost him his job.
Many social media users encouraged the man to end his relationship, suggesting his fiancée is more concerned with having a wedding than a marriage
‘She even said that we needed to get married before the end of 2020,’ he went on.
‘I argued with her about her unreasonable request and how I’m going to lose my job if I sell my car and end up unemployed after looking for so long, that’s not a way to get married.
‘She refused to drop it, called and texted to convince me that if we don’t get married before the end of 2020 then there will not be a wedding at all.
‘Friday, I came across an ad online and saw my car for sale with pictures. When I confronted her she said she was handling it and was going to tell me soon as she found a buyer, I got mad at her and I haven’t seen her ever since. She’s crying saying that I’m picking a car over her and that she was trying to make this work for us.’
The man added that he took a screenshot of the advert on Facebook as proof.
Many asked why the woman was in such a rush to get married, especially when her partner’s sister is battling cancer
Reddit users were less than complimentary about his betrothed, with one asking: ‘What good qualities does this woman have? She sounds straight up awful?’
Another commented: ‘Some people have a really messed up idea of “love”. If getting married is so important then go to the registry office and make it official. If she needs a ceremony (I’m guessing the $17K Hyundai is worth $10K second hand), then she isn’t really going to impress her friends anyway for that kind of cash. Op [original poster] needs to find a better fiancé.’
An appalled Redditor exclaimed: ‘If my partner was in OP’s situation I couldn’t care less about a wedding, I would want OP to spend the extra money on helping his sister. She’s being incredibly selfish and entitled. Not to mention putting that car online behind your back is just awful and manipulative. I can’t believe some people.’
And one suggested: ‘It sounds like all he has to do to get her to break it off is not marry her before the end of 2020, according to her at least.’
‘OP, you’ll find a woman who appreciates a man who supports his family in their time of need. This is not that woman. Kick her to the curb,’ commented another.
But some users were more sympathetic towards the fiancée. One commented: ‘They live in the Middle East. Women not getting married past their 20s, especially when they’ve been dating for a long time is a big deal. In my own culture it’s also a big deal and the cultural importance of family, your community and your reputation is way more than most in the western world can understand.
‘My boyfriend also knows that I should get married before I’m way past 30. Especially because past 30 it will be markedly way more difficult for me to date again if we haven’t been married by then. Family can still do something and arrange a marriage when you’re below 30, but after that it’s difficult. And a wedding is important culturally. If they don’t have some wedding it can be seen as disrespecting their family, or inviting speculations on why they had to get married so secretly.’